Written by Mellisa Trojak, The Art of Etiquette

Writing your own vows is one of the most meaningful things you can do for your wedding day—no pressure, right? Our vow books give you and your beloved space to tell your story. If your heart is full but the ink isn’t flowing, let our vow-writing tips and services guide you through the process. Speak your true love in all its glorious, messy beauty. Capture it forever with books made for the whole life ahead of you.

HOW TO WRITE YOUR OWN VOWS

Your wedding is once-in-a-lifetime, but your vows should be an everyday celebration. While writing them yourselves can seem intimidating, taking the time to create a unique expression of your love is something you won’t regret.

Start with a Few Magic Numbers

Every couple is different, but some advice is universal. We suggest starting to write your vows one to two months before the big day. This gives you time to really think about what you want to say. You’ll want to aim for vows that take 3 minutes max, and are no more than 400 words. The best vows are short but rich in meaning. The key to making them meaningful? You. Honest, authentic, original, and real You.

Make your “I Do’s” Sound Like You

No one can write your vows the way you will. When you start to get stuck or question what you should or shouldn’t say, remember your partner’s marrying you. Embrace your unique shared story and explore ways to let it shine through.

• Will you start with an inside joke you share?
• A poem, song or quote that means something to your relationship?
• A memory that feels especially poignant now that you’ve arrived at this day together?
• A quote from an old letter that still rings true today?

Bring On Those Loving Feelings

For more inspiration, focus on a bit of flattery—the genuine and heartfelt kind, of course. Think about the qualities you most love and admire about your beloved. What made you first realize they were The One?

Write it all down. Our vow books come with plenty of practice pages so you can see where your thoughts and ideas take you. The history you and your partner share is a solid foundation. Next, let’s look ahead to the future.

Promises, Promises

By writing your own vows, you’ve chosen to proclaim a lifelong commitment to your partner in front of cherished family and friends. What are the promises you want to make? Think of not just the words in your promises, but the actions. Years from now, what will it look like to live your vows in big and small moments?

Don’t be afraid to truly speak your heart and mind. Your vows might encompass sweeping sentimental statements. They might take the form of silly, cute promises that mean the world.  Laughter and tears, joy and depth…all of these things can have a place in your vows if that’s what feels true to you and your beloved.

Above all, remember: There’s no such thing as perfect vows. There’s only what’s right for you and yours. Your vows will help you relive this moment for years to come. They’re the beginning of the legacy you’ll pass onto future generations borne of your love and union. When you look back, what you’ll cherish most will be their truth and meaning—perfectly imperfect in your own special way.